Showing posts sorted by relevance for query goal setting. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query goal setting. Sort by date Show all posts

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Small Move, Big Change by Caroline L. Arnold

In Small Move, Big Change, Caroline L. Arnold addresses those who have made big resolutions and failed to keep them. That is a large audience.

Without getting into depth about the first chapter, the reason we fail in our resolutions is habit. When we want to change behavior, we come against the resistance of all our already ingrained behaviors. The larger the change we try to make, the larger is the resistance we experience.

Arnold’s solution is what she calls microresolutions. This is exactly what it sounds like, a commitment to a very small change. It is very important that a microresolution be easy. It should be so small, simple, and easy that you’ll do it in spite of your old habits. Do it consistently, and in a short while it will be a new habit.

There are seven rules to making a good microresolution. The first is already mentioned: make it easy. It should be specific and measurable (you’ve probably seen this before if you’ve read other books about goal-setting). The new behavior should have intrinsic value that provides immediate rewards (for most of us a small reward now is more motivating than the big reward down the road). It should be personalized to the user. It should be liked to a cue. It should resonate with the user (and generally be stated in positive terms). Finally, only take on two microresolutions at a time; you don’t want to exhaust your willpower.

I especially like the suggestion to link the new behavior to a cue. In reviewing my successes in making a change, I’ve often tied the new thing I wanted to do to a trigger. Many of our habitual behaviors are triggered by cues. These cues could be the calendar, the clock, a feeling, a sensory experience, a word, or another behavior. Our cues sometimes aren’t even logically connected to the behaviors they trigger. This is a powerful takeaway for me. In my future goal-setting, I’ll intentionally think of cues that might make a good trigger for the new behavior I want to implement. Using cues allows one to piggyback new habits onto old ones.

All of Arnolds rules are intended to do the same thing: take advantage of the way we form habits. Instead of unconsciously developing habits that may or may not help us, we can intentionally form habits that, bit by bit, move us I the direction we want to go.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in


Arnold, Caroline L. Small Move, Big Change: Using Microresolutions to Transform Your Life Permanently. New York: Viking, 2014.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Succeed by Heidi Grant Halvorson

Grant Halvorson, HeidiSucceed: How We Can Reach Our GoalsNew York: Hudson Street Press, 2010.

Psychologist Heidi Grant Halvorson discusses the latest research on what works in goal setting in her book Succeed.  The way we think about and construct our goals has a lot to do with whether we achieve them.

There a few things that a strongly related to successful goal pursuit.  One is to have goals focused on “getting better” rather than on “being good.”  Many people focus on being good and operate from a theory that talent, ability and personal traits are fixed.  This can lead to discouragement and giving up in the face of difficulties (if you’re not succeeding now, you probably won’t later).  The more fruitful, and it turns out more true, theory is that many personal traits are flexible, even intelligence and personality.  If we make our goal to get better at something, it takes the pressure off of having to do things well at the start (of course you won’t do a new thing well the first time), and gives you the perspective of a learner who can be resilient when experiencing set-backs.

Another important aspect of successful goal pursuit is planning.  Grant Halvorson describes a type of simple planning that helps people achieve goals.  One of the especially powerful things about these plans is that you can foresee temptations and obstacles and plan your response.  If you plan in advance what you’ll do when someone brings doughnuts to the office (I once was acquainted with someone famous for shouting out “Who brought the damn doughnuts?”), you’ll be more like to do it and avoid eating one (or three).


Succeed includes many other strategies for improving goal pursuit.  The effectiveness of these strategies varies depending on what motivates the individual person or the type of goal being pursued.  Grant Halvorson provides simple tests to help the reader discover which strategies will work best for them.  I was not at all surprised by the type of things that motivate me.  I had not previously tried to structure my goals to take advantage of it.  I’m looking forward to putting that idea to the test.

The book also addresses positive thinking and optimism.  I’ve read quite a bit of self-help and you’ll find in some of that literature suggested that positive thinking and optimism is unmitigated good and the essence of achieving dreams.  Grant Halvorson says that imagining you will succeed is very good, but imagining it will be easy is not.  We need to recognize that the road to success has many obstacles, and realistically assessing the obstacles will help us deal with them.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in
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Thursday, April 1, 2010

What I Read (End)

Date: November 27, 2008
Title: His Excellency
Author: Joseph J. Ellis
Thoughts: A readable and balanced biography of a great man.

Date: December 25, 2008
Title: The Spirit
Author: Darwyn Cooke
Thoughts: Great, fun detective stories.

Date: December 28, 2008
Title: Wisdom from the Batcave
Author: Cory A Friedman
Thoughts: A fun way to look at serious ethics.

Date: January 3, 2009
Title: Blink
Author: Malcolm Gladwell
Thoughts: The good, the bad and the hope of snap judgments.

Date: January 5, 2009
Title: The Unfinished Game
Author: Keith Devlin
Thoughts: It’s comforting that someone as smart as Pascal had trouble grasping probabilities, though he was handicapped by having to invent the idea first.

Keith Devlin also coauthored The Numbers behind NUMB3RS.

Date: January 15, 2009
Title: The Water Room
Author: Christopher Fowler
Thoughts: An interesting and enjoyable detective story, but he main draw to me was the underground rivers of London.

Date: January 22, 2009
Title: The Joy of Supernatural Thinking
Author: Bill Bright
Thoughts: A very challenging book.

Date: January 31, 2009
Title: The Big Necessity
Author: Rose George
Thoughts: It’s amazing how many people could have better lives if they could just dispose of their shit, and how hard it seems to be to accomplish it.

Date: February 24, 2009
Title: Why Good Things Happen to Good People
Author: Stephen Post & Jill Neimark
Thoughts:
“The generous soul will be made rich,
And he who waters will be watered himself” (Proverbs 11:25).

Date: March 1, 2009
Title: How to Write Mysteries
Author: Shannon OCork
Thoughts: Lots of good ideas. Now to put them to use.

Date: March 17, 2009
Title: The Emotional Energy Factor
Author: Mira Kirshenbaum
Thoughts: “Worry never comes up with good ideas. It never yields comfort. It never brings your ship to any safe harbor” (quote from the book).

Date: March 26, 2009
Title: Mastering Fiction Writing
Author: Kit Reed
Thoughts: “You’re going to have to write a lot of crap in your life before you write anything good, so you might as well get started” (quote from the book).

Books I Want to Write
Goal Setting that Works
A hardboiled, science fiction crime story
The Prodigal
Phin

Other parts of What I Read:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5,
Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10,
Part 11, Part 12

Sunday, March 13, 2016

Level Up Your Life by Steve Kamb

Life is not a game, but you can learn from games to make your life more adventurous and fulfilling. Steve Kamb, a gaming enthusiast who turned his attention to physical fitness, used concepts of gamification to change his life. He describes the process in Level Up Your Life.

Throughout much of his childhood and into his early adult years, Kamb spent much of his free time playing video games. It was an escape for a life he didn’t always like. On the down side, these nearly addictive games were not helping him achieve a life he really wanted. He began to look for what made games so satisfying and how that could be adapted to making life more satisfying.

It is surprisingly simple. Our brains enjoy making progress, and it triggers our internal reward centers when we get feedback that lets us know we’ve progressed. Designers build incremental progress and associated rewards into the structures of most video games.

Much of the middle part of the book deals with goal setting. It is not much different from the advice you might find in other self-help or popular psychology books, except for the gamification spin. Imagine your idea life (Kamb calls it your “Level 50” life). Choose some challenging, inspiring, big goals (quests). Break them down into smaller, doable goals (specific timelines help). Create systems of accountability and rewards to encourage yourself to stick to it. Find a group, or groups, of people who can help and encourage you along the way.

In the final chapters, he deals with supporting concepts about overcoming fear, supporting your goals with good health and fitness, stirring up you sense of adventure, travel tips, and making the sacrifices you may need to make to live the life you desire and respond to a higher calling. He takes inspiration from fictional heroes of popular culture: Bruce Wayne (Batman), Jason Bourne, Indiana Jones, and Katniss Everdeen. He also lists several resources, both web sites and other books. If you’re inspired by adventure stories (in games, books, film or other media), you may find in Kamb’s book a framework for building the life you want.

I like that Kamb emphasizes that life, like a game, should be enjoyed. We should enjoy the process as well as the achievement. We should be flexible and open to the adventures we may discover along the way; they can enhance our lives and may prove useful to our quest in surprising ways.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in


Kamb, Steve. Level Up Your Life: How to Unlock Adventure and Happiness by Becoming the Hero of Your Own Story. New York: Rodale, 2016.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

This Year I Will... by M. J. Ryan

Many of us make New Year’s resolutions, but few of us keep them. There is less interest on the statistics of other goals, but it seems likely that resolutions are hard to keep whenever we make them. Self-help author and consultant M. J. Ryan would like to change that sorry state of affairs. Her book This Year I Will… has advice on how to turn goals into action and dreams into reality.

Ryan makes the important point that much of our behavior is habitual. We have repeated behaviors so many times that we unthinkingly return to them when we encounter the stimulus that triggers them. To complicate the matter, our behaviors fill a need or solve a problem. If they hadn’t they wouldn’t have become ingrained habits.

You don’t have to delve into you half-remembered childhood to change behavior, though. You just need to identify the underlying need or problem and find other means of dealing with them. Ideally, the new behaviors will also help you meet your goals instead of getting in the way.

I suppose I have made it sound easy.  It is not, and Ryan does not promise quick fixes. In fact, she warns her readers they will face internal resistance to change. There are parts of brain, power emotional parts that exert a lot of control over us, that see change as a threat and will not easily leave the familiar path. Ryan offers advice on how to handle this, and even how to get our emotional brain to help us instead of hinder our change.

The book is organized into short chapters. Ryan suggests you can go directly to the parts you need and return to the other parts later, or when they seem more useful. Instead of being a book you read through once, she wants This Year I Will… to be a reference you can return to when you need fresh ideas or a refresher on techniques you’ve used before.  Some of the subjects that stood out to me were

  • concentrate on “what” instead of “why,”
  • dealing with doubt,
  • taking action,
  • focusing on one or a few changes at a time,
  • taking one step at a time (though sometimes we need a big goal to motivate us),
  • track your progress (I’m a believer in this),
  • have a Plan B (and C, and D…),
  • tips for effective visualization,
  • performance review, and
  • remember to have fun.

There is more than that. The book is not a collection of unrelated mini-chapters. Though the book isn’t necessarily made to be read linearly, I found that later chapters tend to build on earlier ones. There is also a subtle shift from an almost wholly practical to a somewhat philosophical view. You’re not just doing a better job of setting and achieving goals. The goals you achieve and the habits you form shape and define your life.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in

Ryan, M. J. This Year I Will…: How to Finally Change a Habit, Keep a Resolution, or Make a Dream Come True. New York: MJF, 2006.

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Thursday, June 4, 2020

Get Your Sh*t Together by Sarah Knight

The title of Sarah Knight’s book, Get Your Sh*t Together, suggests what is inside. There is cursing on practically every page. There is tongue-in-cheek humor. There is advice on how to set goals and achieve them.

If you’ve read many books on self-help, getting organized, setting goals and success, Knight’s recommendations won’t be new to you. However, many will find her style helpful and appealing. She writes with directness, simplicity and humor.

She has a take on motivation that you don’t see everywhere: focus on what annoys you. A lot of people advise that you conjure up a richly detailed vision of the life you want. That is hard. The vision can seem out of reach. You don’t have to imagine annoying things; they are right there bothering you. If you can do something to reduce the annoyance, you’ll want to, and if some series of steps will eliminate it, they’ll seem worth the effort. The life you want may reveal itself as you shed the annoying things you want to get rid of.

Once you have a goal (stop this annoying thing by taking some action), you need a plan that breaks into manageable steps. You’ll also need to set aside time to give your energy and attention to taking those steps. It also takes commitment to follow through.

Because it takes time to get things done, you may need to make time by spending less of it on other things. Knight discusses priorities. I’ve observed that the people who are the worst at having it together seem to have no priorities. If you can learn to spend more time on what is really important, and focus on it, you’ll be way ahead.

Knight’s book isn’t for everyone. The cursing starts in the title and doesn’t let up. However, I appreciate her brevity, simplicity and directness. The concepts are easy to grasp; the challenge is in implementing them.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in

The Procrastination Equation by Piers Steel

Secrets You Keep from Yourself by Dan Neuharth

Succeed by Heidi Grant Halvorson

You are a Badass by Jen Sincero

Knight, Sarah. Get Your Sh*t Together: How to Stop Worrying About What You Should Do So You Can Finish What You Need to Do and Start Doing What You Want to Do. New York: Little, Brown and Company, 2016.