Keenan's Book Reviews: Search results for Michaela Chung

Showing posts sorted by relevance for query Michaela Chung. Sort by date Show all posts

Saturday, April 7, 2018

The Irresistible Introvert by Michaela Chung

Introverts can feed out of place, in especially in the United States and other places where extroverted characteristics are celebrated and introverts are often misunderstood. Michaela Chung considers how introverts can make their own way in the word in her book The Irresistible Introvert.

Introverts are not antisocial or shy. We (yes, I’m an introvert) like people. In comparison to extroverts we tend to be more introspective, needful of solitude and quiet and slow. Some introverts are highly sensitive people (I think I fall into this group, too).

Chung doesn’t say there is a right or wrong way, there is a place for both extroverts and introverts and all the blends in between. Her point is that in extroverted cultures introverts need to find ways to be comfortable being themselves.

That is Chung’s theme: introverts should accept themselves. If you are an introvert, embrace your strengths and stop trying to fit into an extroverted mold. Be kind to yourself. Make room in your life for the quite time, solitude and thinking that you need.

Of course, introverts are social beings. We enjoy connecting with others. We like deep conversation and close friends.

For many of us, this area of connection and communication can become a source of discomfort as our style clashes with the prevailing extroverted style. In the latter part of the book, Chung shifts to showing how introverts can find ways to open up, form friendships and communicate in ways that play to their strengths.

Introverts aren’t likely to work the room the way extroverts do. We can, we just find it exhausting. Chung’s advice often touches on this issue of energy. With a little planning, introverts can manage their energy in social situations. Introverts can be spots of calm and warmth in a crowd that attracts others. They can trade awkwardness and tiredness for self-possession and intriguing allure.

Chung draws frequently on the experiences of introverts including herself. Many of these experiences resonated with me. If you’re an introvert you might enjoy the book simply because you can see someone else understands your experience. You might find some of Chung’s advice helpful, too.

I you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in

The Emotional Energy Factor by Mira Kirshenbaum

The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron

The Introvert's Way by Sophia Dembling

Quiet by Susan Cain

Chung, Michaela. The Irresistible Introvert: Harness the Power of Quiet Charisma in a Loud World. New York: Skyhorse Publishing, 2016.

New & Interesting Stuff April 7, 2018

The Big Thing by Phyllis Korkki

Black History Month Links 2017

The Gentleman Scientists by Tom Schachtman

The Irresistible Introvert by Michaela Chung

The Last Self-Help Book You'll Ever Need by Paul Pearsall

Nearing Home by Billy Graham

New & Interesting Stuff November 11, 2017

The Numerati by Stephen Baker

Overwhelmed by Brigid Schulte

Rewire Your Anxious Brain by Catherine M. Pittman & Elizabeth M. Karle

The Supergirls by Mike Madrid

The Society for Useful Knowledge by Jonathan Lyons

Stan Lee by Bob Batchelor

Friday, May 15, 2020

The Introvert's Way by Sophia Dembling

Introverts are coming out of their shells, but in their own way. This isn’t to say they are becoming more introverted. Instead they are demand that the traits they bring are valued. We are not simply “not extroverted.”

Blogger Sophia Dembling is part of this wave of outspoken introverts. She writes about living as an introvert in a culture that values extroversion, and how to become more comfortable with it, in The Introvert’s Way.

Personality is a complex subject. Introversion is one of five personality traits that seem to remain consistent over a person’s lifetime.

Actually, extroversion is the trait that is measured. A typical test defines introversion as a lack of extroversion. Dembling calls this into question. She sees introversion as a way of interacting with external and internal stimulus that is different from extroversion. It is not better or worse and it certainly is not an absence of a personality trait.

Dembling is not shy about taking on extroversion bias in psychology and research. For instance, she wrote about research that showed extroverts to be happier. Even introverts who acted extroverted seemed happier. She found that psychologists have a three pronged definition of happiness, but the researchers used only one. The signs of happiness in this prong are practically synonymous with traits of extroversion. No wonder extroverts seemed happier. Introverts are often happy in their own way.

Much of the book is a discussion of the introverted experience. It can be tough to be introverted in a culture that values extroversion (not all do). How do you deal with well-meaning friends who try to get you to have fun when you’re already perfectly contented? How do you manage your energy, especially when things that get others psyched leave you drained?

Dembling offers advice on these issues. Her core advice is to accept your introversion. You are different and that is fine. You can create a space for you to be you. You can teach you friends to respect who you are just as you have respected their extroversion.

Introverts who begin to embrace who they are can seem like angry turtles at first. However, we are not inclined to disturb our peace with resentment; we move on to living a life we like with a little gentle forcefulness.

I previously wrote about this book in another post.

If you’re interested in this book, you may also be interested in

The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron

The Irresistible Introvert by Michaela Chung

Quiet by Susan Cain

Dembling, Sophia. The Introvert’s Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World. New York: Perigee, 2012.