Cain divides her book into four parts corresponding to four questions
about introversion. What are the roots
of the preference for extroversion
in the West,
especially in America? Is introversion real, a quality inherent to
our nature? Are there cultures where
introversion is preferred? Finally, how
to introvert live in an extroverted culture?
What Cain calls the “Extrovert
Ideal” arose with a cultural shift to a focus on personality. This isn’t personality
as a trait as she uses in the rest of the book, but personality as personal forcefulness, persuasion
and salesmanship. This seems to have arisen naturally over time
with the rise of industry
and our move to cities. We were less producers and more sellers, and
the main thing we had to sell was ourselves.
Cain uses as an example, though the trend started earlier, Dale Carnegie
(a Missourian
like me). Carnegie propelled himself
from shy farm boy to dynamic people person by mastering public
speaking and he built and business
that still exists today on teaching people to be more outgoing.
The distinction between introversion and extroversion is more that
cultural, though. There is evidence that
inborn physiological
difference play a role in these personalities.
Cain discusses research on the subject that suggest there is a biological basis
that at least partly explains
introversion, though life experience likely still plays some role. There is not a 100 percent correlation
between being a “highly reactive” or “highly sensitive” person and being an
introvert, but many introverts reading this book will probably recognize
themselves in these categories.
Though the Extrovert Ideal prevails in the West, introversion seems to
be preferred in the East. We see this in the quiet studiousness that
has become the reputation of Asian-Americans. Many Asian cultures
prefer quiet, reserve, deference, reflectiveness
and other traits associated with introversion.
They are seen as wisdom, politeness and respect.
Though extroverts draw most of the attention, and that will likely
continue, introverts have strengths that can be useful in organization and
society (introverts aren’t antisocial, they just deal with stimulus differently
than extroverts). Introverts are more
likely to pay attention to warning signs.
For instance, Warren Buffet
predicted the collapse of the internet bubble.
He wasn’t being a bearish pessimist; he was just paying attention to
signs that reward-hungry extroverts were ignoring. Cain found her questioning mind and quiet
demeanor made her an excellent negotiator because she could question assertions
without seeming overly aggressive. I’ve
often found myself in the role of mediator and negotiator for the same reason;
I could listen, sort out what people really wanted, and offer a compromise.
Not only that, Cain offers a path for happy introversion. We can be true to ourselves and be as
extroverted as we need to be to accomplish those things that are truly
important to us. Extroverts can be as
quiet as they need to be, too.
Reading Quiet prompted me to
think a lot about my introversion. With
a few exceptions (I was never especially afraid of public speaking—it got me
out of the crowd of pressing bodies in the audience), I’m a typical
introvert. I may write about
it sometime. I suspect many introverts
who read it will find much to reflect on, especially since such reflection will
come naturally. It is a worthy book for
extroverts, too, for insight into the many obvious and hidden introverts in
their lives, probably a few very close to them.
Cain, Susan. Quiet: The Power if Introverts in a World
That Can’t Stop Talking. New York: Crown, 2012.
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